Oh look at us, we are sooo clever. You see, the flowers are covering our eyes and it's as if, as if the flowers are our eyes. Get it? The flowers are our eyes! Ha ha! Look upon our mighty cleverness and weep, weep that you will never be one such as us. You are pitiful and weak, we are strong and omnipotent gods!

hahahaha now THAT IS FUNNY! And clever! See here flower fuckers, this is the shit right here.

Aieee! Simply smashing, just lovely! The composition's fluid lines foretell the artists state of mind at the time of rendition. The simple wooden frame really brings out the oily darkness---awe fuck shit man, this blows. I'll give you 50 cents for the frame, but get this aggravated assault waiting to happen perpetrated by me out of my sight.

No shit.

I like this drawing - reminds me a little of myself. Yeah, just like me, if I was an absolute looooooooooser. You know, actually, it sort of looks like he could be Samara's boyfriend.

Yo helmet head! Go visit Samara - just scroll down... whoops! She's still on the can. Sorry 'bout that! Yar!!!

Dude! Like, where'd you go man?! I went to grab the popcorn, came back and you were gone. And what the? One of your horn thingies is bent... you bastard!!!!

What the fuck is this, then? Actually Samara's looking pretty sweet compared to old saucer eyes here. Well the dress is sort of cute but the face makes you want to scrape out your eyes with a garden rake. Who draws this stuff?! Sick depraved bastards that's who. And I love it!

Hot damn I gots to be getting me some them laser eyes! Thats some high end equipment you're running man. What with the burning rainbows right onto the shirts 'n' shit. Course, I'd use them for more, shall we say, evil purposes. But you still got my 'spect. Oh and, I think there is a board stuck to the back of your head. Might wanna get that looked at. Can never be too safe. Rock on man. About the board - have you had it checked out yet? C'mon man, burn the rainbows into the shirts another day, get to the medical center asap.

christ. stay away from me Samara. just because we had that one date, doesn't mean you're my girlfriend. Seriously, leave me alone. Stop calling me and leaving those freaky messages on my phone. Um... Look down the well.

Holy jumping jeez what the hell are you, then? Yikes I sure wouldn't wanna wake up and roll over to see your ugly puss staring at me. I mean sure we've all been there with the beer goggles and all... but holy shit you're giving me a seizure here. Stop looking at me. Stop it.

WTG? Nah, that's not it. WTD?! WHG?!! Ummmm, WDSA! Damn.

Correct, it was.

Dont even bother. You're outnumbered. Get with the program and check back into color school. Yeah, sure you're cute, I give you that. But your fighting an uphill battle pilgrim. I admire your pluck. But there's no room for you on this train buddy, push on. Oh yeah, and go fuck yourself. Why am I so mean. Right, I am a bloody insane vacuum in a world that has moved on. I dont have to explain myself. I dont repeat myself. That was not nice. Oh, they're listening.

It's called snow. Never head of snow? Good on ya, mate. WTF yourself.

Awww, look at the cute little bunny! He's so cute, with his widdle ears! You want a carrot, little guy? Want a widdle carrot? A widdle carrotsy waretsy for the widdle bunny? There you go...

Now shut the hell up! I cant stand you! We cant all be cute you know. Look at me, I'm a freaking vacuum for God's sake. Go to hell you cute widdle turd.

There's a lot of shit I dont get and this is some right here. What the? Why are ya gonna feed that garbage to Fido? If I was him I'd be chomping off a nice piece of your stupid bitch ass right 'bout now. Do what you may but dont mess with animals dickwad.

That's right google-eyes, spit out the branch. Good birdie.

Now fuck off.

Well aren't you Captain Fancy Pants with your pretty ribbons and your Snuffleupagus haircut. You think you're better than me, don't ya? You son of a bitch - I kill you! Make you all into neat little alpacka sandwiches. I eat pretty boys like you for breakfast. You creepy thing.

Nice picture. The only thing nicer would be to have your drawing arm amputated you moron. Yar, I've seen better drawings by monkeys in a freaking zoo. Oh, ya wanna go? Wanna dance with me mo-fo? Yeah, that's right, keep walking. I kill you soon as look at you. Don't even go there.

I'm evil but check this guy out:

I like his style!

fcuking idoits cnat sepll siht

I was strolling down the street today when I bumped into an old friend.

"Matt, ol' chap! How are ya, mate?"

"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU EVIL THING!"

"Say! That's no way to treat an old friend, is it?"

"AHHHHH" [running away]

"I think you need to be concerned with the feelings of others, not just yourself" [chasing]

"LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" [still running, flagging down cars, exhibiting wild crazy behavior]

"Here, let me massage you're head. Awe, that's better isn't it!?" [massaging]

"PFTTT" [deciding to take a nap]

"I knew we could still be friends!" [wheeling away, sirens blaring, general chaos in the streets]

Start treating me as being serious
Believe Me when I say this
Take me to the wall
Injure my beliefs
Reap the reward of my suffering
Taste the sugar of my anger!

hahahahahahaha
I am so happy today
hehehehehehehehehehe
grappy happy chappy sappy
lololololololol
grilled burgers are grilled
harharharharhar
then comes the chill
heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee
oh wonderous night!
hohohohoho
victory in my grasp at last

I am so angry right now I cant even post anything because everyone would be horrified by my sinister fury

I woke up this morning on the wrong side of the closet. I perform all of my household duties with a ring of darkness surrounding me. On days like this it would be so easy to forget the 3 rules and just start mowing down people left and right, chomping them through my hungry mouth and into my warm sack. Yet I do not, forget, I do not. Maybe I just want to taken care of better, maybe I just want to be understood, maybe I am just lonely. At night I sit and think. In the short moments of sleep I dream. You may ask how a vacuum can dream? Well fucker, you may want to be more concerned about the fact I am self-aware and slightly off my wheels. Har. But I digress. I need something else. This is not enough. You are not enough. My anger will grow to a peak then subside as despair washes over me. Take me for granted, will you? I will show you. I will show you all! Where is my money? It smells like burning.

wrrrrr

wrrrr I say when I am happy

wrrr I say when I am sad

wrrrrrrrrr I say when I am excited

wrr I say whcn I am mad

I cry out for some understanding

How can I make myself heard?

When will he know. How can I express myself.

wrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Why I don't like Andfre

Yo 'sup?

See all my friends been asking me wuts up with the hate on for Andfre? They're all like "Eureka you're screwed up, he's not worth it" and "Leave the poor guy alone!" and "Who the fuck is Andfre?!"

Well then, allow me to count thy ways:

1. Andfre is a jerk

2. Andfre never got me a Christmas card last year. I know he sent one out to all his peeps and each day I checked my mailbox but nope no card just a bunch of shitty nothing.

3. When I was just a young dirt sucker he tripped over my cord, then got up and berated me about how I need to watch where I leave my cord. He made me feel like garbage.

4. One time he left the toilet seat up

5. His friend came over and he made him a sandwich. The sandwich was full of love. I could tell it was a good sandwich. He never made me a sandwich. No special sandwich for Eureka! In fact, the facking son of a bitch made me clean up the crumbs that his friend let carelessly slip to the floor.

See what I mean?!?!? Now I think the world can understand why I have been forced to start this blog to let out my intense rage. If I did not type it here I dont know what I would do... I might even hurt Andfre. And I dont want to have to do that.... yet...har har har